


Distracted On The Battlefield

by Schneidropov



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Body Worship, Just A Bit Satire, Long Hair, M/M, Unrequited Love, one-sided
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 18:25:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8678416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Schneidropov/pseuds/Schneidropov
Summary: "And of course it was irrefutably Prince Takumi he had to wake. Jakob rolled his eyes and stepped up to his bed. 'Prince Takumi, I’d advise you wake up.'” Jakob might have just a tiny little crush on Takumi. But only when his hair is down. And when he's not awake. And when it's early in the morning.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own these characters, nor do I own the setting or game in general. Thanks for reading.

“Morning, Jakob!” Yashiji exclaimed loud enough for everyone to hear. She sat up, yawning and stretching. Today was going to be a good day, she thought.

“Ah, milady. Good morning to you, as well.” Jakob entered Yashiji’s room and sighed out of exhaustion. That didn’t stop him, though, from automatically beginning to clean up right as he walked in, as it was a habit of his.

Usually, Yashiji would not be in such a somewhat irritatingly good mood that early in the morning. But that day was different; she spent most of the night worrying about her brother, Takumi, for he was distracted by something on the battlefield that she couldn’t come to a conclusion as to what. And because the battle ended after dusk, she couldn’t confront him about it as he was already checked out by the time she got to chat. So this was the day she would be able to ask him about and possibly fix this problem.

“Hey, Jakob. Instead of cleaning, would you mind doing me a small favor?” Yashiji pushed the blanket off of her and stood up a bit groggily.

“But of course not, milady. What is it you desire?”

Yashiji yanked her armor off the rack in front of her bed and stepped behind the panel screen to get dressed. “Could you fetch Takumi for me?”

“Huh?” Jakob was a bit surprised at Lady Yashiji’s request; he could do anything in the world for her - sacrifice his life, take any blame, kill, suffer - but a simple walk in the park? What poppycock! Jakob thought. When he wasn’t in danger or a scapegoat for Lady Yashiji, what was he? A simple butler who makes nothing but tea and dilly-dallies all day long? Another Felicia?

“Just go get him for me please.”

But he wasn’t about to complain, not to Lady Yashiji.

“Oh. As you wish.”

~~~

When Jakob arrived at Takumi’s room, he sneered. Of course he was still asleep. Oh, how he hated having to wake someone up; it was a grueling task, for whomever was sleeping never enjoyed an interruption of their slumber and would not hesitate telling him about how they despised him for it.

And of course it was irrefutably Prince Takumi he had to wake. Jakob rolled his eyes and stepped up to his bed. “Prince Takumi, I’d advise you wake up.”

But Prince Takumi didn’t so much as stir.

“Lady Yashiji wants you to wake up, Prince Takumi. So wake. Up.” Jakob resisted the urge to shout as many people were still asleep and he didn’t want to be on the end of that blade. But he wasn’t afraid to get his hands dirty when need be.

He shook Lord Takumi’s arm a couple times, yet to no avail. He shook more vigorously, but not even a flinch. Did this man hang out with the Nohrians too much? Because he might as well flush him down the toilet like the piece of crap he is. To wake him up, of course. But, this was getting off track. He would never. Heh.

“Oh gods, you freaking moron! Move once if you’re alive!” Jakob was about to flip out, and when Jakob flipped out he didn’t get figurative, but something changed his mind. Well, distracted him, at the least. Lord Takumi’s hair wasn’t in its normal set-up; it was down for once, and it was sprawled out on the bed like a peafowl’s feathered tail. Jakob had never seen it like that before; then again, he’s never seen Lord Takumi sleep. Maybe he did that every night and Jakob never noticed. How inattentive of him, Jakob thought. Where is his spyglass when he needs it?

Jakob tried not to follow through with whatever the heck he was trying to pull next, but his curiosity got the better of him. Plus, it wasn’t going to hurt anyone. He hesitated, but then smoothed Prince Takumi’s hair with his hand, just to feel how silky and soft it was.

How he kept it so beautiful, Jakob couldn’t fathom. But it didn’t stop him from combing it with his fingers all the way from Takumi’s scalp to the very tips of each strand and ogling at the length and time he must embed into brushing this mane every morning when it’s knotted and resembling nothing more than a rat’s nest atop a mobile tower of stupidity.

Oh, how silly this is, Jakob realised when he looked at Prince Takumi’s sleeping face. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to take his hands off such gorgeous locks. And Takumi wouldn’t mind so long as he didn’t wake. Oh, how fun it would be to do this every day.

Wait, wait, wait. Jakob pulled himself away. Although he was having fun, it was completely wrong. First of all, he was there to take Prince Takumi to Lady Yashiji, not “ooh” and “aah” at him. Second of all, it was just weird to play with someone’s hair as one thing, but it was another thing to do it whilst they weren’t aware. Third of all, he would never do such a thing, never mind to Prince Takumi! Why was he doing that? He didn’t have any feelings towards him, and he never would! He wasn’t in the right mindset, Jakob concluded. It was early, after all.

Jakob straightened his back and prepared to try and wake Prince Takumi up again. Anything for Lady Yashiji, he recalled. As he was about to push Prince Takumi off the bed, he noticed something else about him… his face. His cheeks were ever so slightly pink, his eyelashes long and graceful, and he had just the most innocent dreaming smile Jakob had ever seen… he was so adorable as he slept!

Wait, stop this nonsense! Jakob stepped back and looked away, trying to get his mind off of what took over his thoughts. Prince Takumi wasn’t cute, not in the slightest. He never would be and never will be. End of story. That’s why Jakob wasn’t blushing. Yep. Wasn’t blushing at all.

Oh gods, he was blushing! Jakob hid his face in his hands, ashamed of himself. He shouldn’t think that way about such a snotty, arrogant, angry, feisty, sexy… no, that was wrong! Snap out of it, Jakob!! He scolded himself over and over and over again.

But there was something beckoning him towards Prince Takumi again… some kind of force…

But he was going to ignore it!

But it was growing louder and more persistent…

But it was wrong!

But it was right…

He stepped closer to Prince Takumi once more, hoping nothing of grave importance lie at Jakob’s convenience, just waiting to be fondled.

Takumi’s hands. They were small, much like a female’s. In fact, too much like a female’s. They were also the softest hands ever. Just looking at them from afar, Jakob could tell they were smooth, and probably warm. Small hands, soft hands, lovely hands… and to be using them on a filthy bow made Jakob want to crush something. He shouldn’t be using those hands for war or battle!

Jakob thought of something else they could do, though…

Oh gods. Heaven just shut up shop.

Jakob couldn’t stop staring at the sight. And oh, what a sight it was. Takumi lying gracefully in his bed, as graceful as Camilla’s middle name, not shouting, not angry, but at peace. Why couldn’t he stay like that forever? Jakob didn’t prevent himself from thinking about such pervertry, in spite of the fact that it was completely insane to begin with.

It would’ve made anyone blush to the tip of their ears, too, right? Jakob wasn’t the only one, right? Right?

Oh, Jakob hoped he was right. Because his next action wasn’t as thought out as it would’ve been if he had had a clear mind.

He leaned down and cupped his hands around Takumi’s cheeks, putting his face so close to Takumi’s that the tips of their noses touched. How could he not? He was just too cute. It was the same feeling people get when they see a small, little puppy - they just want to squeeze its little face!

Jakob leaned closer, putting his forehead against Takumi’s and rubbing their noses together.

Prince Takumi’s eyes suddenly opened.

“Gah!” Jakob retracted, putting his hands behind his back and closing his eyes hard, hoping to gods that Prince Takumi didn’t see that.

“Jakob? Were you..?” Prince Takumi trailed off, too tired to process what just happened.

Jakob didn’t let him finish. “I absolutely despise you, Prince Takumi! Your weird dreams about me are just that; dreams. Don’t bring me into your fetishes!”

“Fetishes? But I thought you were just giving me Eskimo kisses…” Takumi rubbed his eyes. Gods, why did he have to be so cute when he said “Eskimo kisses”?! Jakob shook his head and cleared his mind, regaining his composure.

“I don’t know what you’re even speaking of, imbecile,” Jakob retaliated angrily. The blush on his face, however, proved otherwise.

Prince Takumi sat up and stretched. But then, his adorable sleepy face was gone, and in his normal voice, he snarked, “Hey, why are you in here in the first place?”

Back to the hellish Prince Takumi everyone knew and hated… “Lady Yashiji wanted me to fetch you. But you weren’t waking up as easily as I thought you would, being the scrawny little boy you are.”

“So you woke me up by giving me Eskimo kisses?!”

“No!!” Jakob was getting more and more embarrassed the longer he stood in this bottomless pit of embarrassment. “I have no more time for your dumb accusations. I advise you come with me so I can take your sorry ass to Lady Yashiji before I make your sorry ass sorry that it ever defied me or my advisory!”

Jakob stomped out the door, turning his face away from Prince Takumi as much as possible. Prince Takumi followed shortly after. The walk to Lady Yashiji’s room would be a traverse through a path of Setsuna’s daily.

Luckily, they made it to Lady Yashiji's room quicker than expected. However, as Jakob was about to step past the threshold to freedom, Prince Takumi put his mouth uncomfortably close to Jakob’s ear and whispered:

“Why don’t you come to my room later and I’ll let you touch my hair as much as you like? I know how much you like to play with it when it’s down like this.”

Jakob froze. A blush red enough to turn Leo into a crazed cannibal crept onto Jakob’s face. “You-! You were-? How did you-?!”

And Takumi passed the stuttering man, waving to his sister. Now who’ll be the one who gets distracted on the battlefield?

**Author's Note:**

> shit


End file.
